As many mainstream recording artists can testify, there is nothing like putting out a Christmas album to keep your name alive. That basically gives an excuse for them to generate medium hype through advertising, spots on TV shows, interviews and the whole PR machine.
Did any of these artists sat down and thought about Christmas to write a song? It's impossible. I'm about to break some harsh news to the kids out there. Let's face it: the holidays are mostly a pain in the ass. This period of the year can still bring out the party in all of us, however, the market is increasingly aggressive towards the consumer, flooding all senses with mindless advertisement. When it comes down to it, four days of celebration are not worth two months of mind bashing.
So for (the) Christ sake, who can actually write an anthem dedicated to this whole mess?
Predictable like an ass grabbing uncle on punch, the industry got it all covered. Just have the band write a half a dozen new half-assed love ballads. Then record said tracks. Then enters the final ingredient: the jingle bells. Use it on any dish, at your preference, just like salt. This automatically transforms any song into a brand new holiday hit. You can also add a choir, preferably composed of kids. To make it extra customized, throw in a few references to winter, snow, Jesus, world peace and family.
For the same reason things stupid in nature often never stops being, the motive behind this absurdity is because there is enough people out there eating it, then asking for seconds.
Just like stuffed turkey, the Christmas Album makes me sleepy.
Did any of these artists sat down and thought about Christmas to write a song? It's impossible. I'm about to break some harsh news to the kids out there. Let's face it: the holidays are mostly a pain in the ass. This period of the year can still bring out the party in all of us, however, the market is increasingly aggressive towards the consumer, flooding all senses with mindless advertisement. When it comes down to it, four days of celebration are not worth two months of mind bashing.
So for (the) Christ sake, who can actually write an anthem dedicated to this whole mess?
Predictable like an ass grabbing uncle on punch, the industry got it all covered. Just have the band write a half a dozen new half-assed love ballads. Then record said tracks. Then enters the final ingredient: the jingle bells. Use it on any dish, at your preference, just like salt. This automatically transforms any song into a brand new holiday hit. You can also add a choir, preferably composed of kids. To make it extra customized, throw in a few references to winter, snow, Jesus, world peace and family.
For the same reason things stupid in nature often never stops being, the motive behind this absurdity is because there is enough people out there eating it, then asking for seconds.
Just like stuffed turkey, the Christmas Album makes me sleepy.
